When we reserve our annual holiday – we already have a good idea of what we want, and where we want to go. We get several brochures on the location and compare the travel companies. We ruthlessly read and eliminate hotels despite beautiful photos, lots of amenities and services all offering their versions of paradise in glossy brochures. Everything is laid out and designed to please, and the prices are carefully put in a separate section of the brochure, explaining carefully what the prices are, what the parameters are, such as departure dates, prices for different lengths of stay, is transport to and from the hotel from the airport included in the price? etc.
We check out the hotels on internet looking for what is missing, and what the catches are. We are extremely savvy. We want the ‘biggest bang for our financial buck’, We will be spending hard earned cash, so we examine closely the separate section of the brochure with the prices, and make calculations, based on dates, length of stay, and quality, and how it will fit in with our own lives, and our own habits, constraints, wishes, needs and wants.
We find out about what is in the neighbourhood, what activities are offered in the surroundings, (can we visit a particular site, or do a particular activity while we are there?). We know exactly where we are going and why, for how long, at what price, and what makes our hotel different from the rest. For instance, we know that we want a twin, non-smoking room, with air conditioning, safe, shower and view of the beach, not too close to the discothèque, and we are prepared to make sure the travel agent understands this and takes it into consideration!
Why is it that a lot of us don’t we do that level of research with men, before we commit money, time and resources? We might go out with someone, because they appear to have what we want. We don’t know in detail what we are getting into: who they are, what their values are, what they stand for. We might not know where they come from, and what they believe in, or how they treated their previous girlfriends. We might ignore what their annoying habits are and if we can accept them. Most important of all: will they truly respect us, and love us for who and how we are? How will they fit in with our own lives, and our own habits, constraints, wishes, time availability needs and wants?
We may give them the benefit of the doubt, and could end up spending more time with them on a bad date, than we do picking out our annual holiday.
Why?
Being with someone is a financial as well as a time investment. What makes them so special we should be with them? What makes them so special, we should ignore all the other available men in life’s catalogue of options? Everyone is busy. What makes them worthy of our time? Relationships take time and effort, and lots of investment, planning, logistics, making concessions, and a certain amount of money. Relationships usually last a lot longer than an average holiday. Let’s start doing the deep research like they were our annual holiday!
I hope this has helped. Let me know what you think.